Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Happy now, sad later....

No...more like so utterly remorseful and full of so much guilty pains that I've cried about it. I don't know why I did it...maybe dealing with stress, maybe I was upset about something, maybe Aunt Flow is coming to visit or maybe it was all of these combined.

But, on Wednesday, I bought a box of doughnuts at Spikes. Each doughnut was 190 calories. There were three kinds and four each, making 12 doughnuts with a total of the whole box coming to 2280 calories (yeah, I used a calculator just now because my brain is fried from school and if I tried thinking mental math with two and three digits, look out for a mental breakdown).

All the doughnuts were gone by Sunday...and I had them hidden in my room. Those four days I didn't think about it, but on Sunday when I weighed myself and saw I gained four pounds I kind of went over the top with emotions. I was upset and so far every night when I go to bed I do cry under the covers...and I'm crying now.

They saying writing about this kind of stuff is therapeutic and I think it might be because you can tell people your troubled without having to look at them face to face. Perhaps it's to get things out that even you didn't know about yourself.

I don't know...

I'd write more, but I have to get ready for work...maybe more later.
Signing off for now....

Height: 5'4"
Weight....174lbs :'(

2 comments:

  1. Ok...when? Tonight I'm home at 7:30, but I don't know what you're doing at church or...? You're not going to yell at me are?

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